I4110

This morning was going about as normal as it could be,but within 5 minutes of waking up,I found myself on the floor screaming to God to take away the pain I was in. Never have I ever been in so much agony in my life. The pains shooting through me as if a knife was being stabbed through my back,twisted,then removed only to do it again. I couldn't breathe,I couldn't see straight,I couldn't do anything except pray. Within a half hour I was in the E.R. Triage being asked about my medical history.About an hour later,I was lying in a VCT machine while I was being x-rayed in what looked like an airplane turbine. Still confused,and kinda worried about what was going on,I found myself staring at the ceiling repeating one thing...God is with me.

I don't think anyone can count how many times God tells us in the Bible,to fear not because He is always with us. I really didn't care what the diagnosis would say,I just wanted it to be figured out. I was very fortunate today to find out that I have kidney stones. Yes,they are referred to as "male pregnancy" due to the pain being so severe that it's equal to woman giving birth,but still. I looked around that room thinking about how many people were in that machine when the discovered they had cancer,or tumors,or another serious medical condition. I knew then,how lucky I really was.

Isaiah 41:10 says,"Fear not,for I am with you. I will strengthen you and help you. I will uphold you with my righteous right hand." That was on repeat in my mind today,along with about a thousand verses from Psalms. Today,I looked every fear I've ever had in the eye and spoke that over it. I said,"I won't fear,God is with me. He's here right now helping me and giving me strength through this time." It worked. Now I know this isn't high up on the medical totem pole,and I guarantee you know someone going through a much more difficult time,but this is the hardest thing I've had to deal with in medical terms,and I passed. I gave it to God knowing that He was doing His part,so I had to do mine...simply trust in Him.

The next time you're faced with something tragic,whether it be medical or emotional or whatever it is,remember that verse and see how different the outcome is when you can truly trust Him through it.